Fathers' fight to be important in america continues
by Archie Wortham
I don't know about you, but I'm boiled about the issue of whether a 6 year-old should be with his father or not. This is not an issue for such a litigious nation as the United States to decide. The issue of whether a 6-year-old boy should stay in a foreign country and possibly not see his father for the rest of his life is not something a green card can resolve. It's not something Immigration Services should be resolving. The issue of whether or not a 6-year-old should be made a political pawn of aspiring candidates is not something sitting elected officials or the man on the street should be answering. The answer lies with the boy's dad. His father is the only one who should be making this decision. Yet America is attempting to drive another stake in every man who is or ever hoped to be a father. The boy should go home! A son needs his father. Today, more and more people are willing to accept that fathers also need their sons!
I'm not going to go into some diatribe about what the standards of living here compares with the standards of living somewhere else. There is not a man alive today who didn't at one time in his life wish to live with someone other than his dad. I'm one of them. I often thought that the boy up the road, or the person who always dressed in the nicest clothes had it better than me. But I didn't have the reference point God had, when God chose my dad. God knew who was best for me, and if I allowed him, my dad would make the decisions that were best for me in the long run. For my dad, that decision was to have his older sister raise me. Did I have say in it? Back then, a five-year-old didn't have much of say in anything. I did what I was told, and my dad did what he thought was right. Why can't we allow this boy's dad to do the same? He's not turning his back on his son. He wants his son.
Yet America wants to ignore the father. This is the same America, where, if a man turns his back on his children, we call him deadbeat, worthless, even a criminal. In America, if a father chooses to not live up to his responsibility, we want to, and in some cases--DO!... 'sic' the law on him. But we are now acting as though this boy's father has no right to claim his son. America, in her arrogance, is showing what she really thinks about fathers. Men are drones, good only for breeding. In America, it seems fathers come nowhere close to being as vital in the healthy life of our children as mothers do. I say enough!
I don't know Elian's father. I have no idea what life is like in Cuba. But I knew my father, and I knew that regardless of the life he wanted for me, I wanted to be with him, not somebody else. Granted my dad chose to do what he thought was best for me, and there were times when I felt he didn't love me. But the fact remained, he was my dad! I knew I had a father. America did not scream at my dad's decision, and if he had wanted to take me back at any time, there was not a court in the country that would have denied that choice. Why are we stealing the choice away from Elian's dads?
Ever wondered why God chose you to be the father of your kids? This has nothing to do with whether you believe in God or not, but rather how you feel about taking care of something that is part of you. How would you feel if you were told you were insignificant to that child? How would you feel if you were told that you didn't matter? How would you feel later in life, once you grew up, knowing that you became a victim in a hypocritically charged vendetta against a country you just happened to have been born in. Slave children were taken away from their families. Now, years later, many people are saying how uncaring, callous, and cruel it was. How did we get to be so sanctimonious and such a short memory in such a few years?
It's not about what we want. It's about what's right! Studies show that fathers are important. Courts, more and more, are awarding fathers custody. No longer are fathers looked upon as the only providers, but mothers are no longer looked upon as the only nurturers. Men have feelings, and as with the fatherhood movement championed by Wade Horn, David Blankenhorn, David Popenoe, and others, America is beginning to realize men know what it means to be 'child-centered.'
I can't make much difference in the decisions that will be made concerning little Elian, but I may be able to make a small difference in the hearts of the men and women who read this. If a father wants to be involved, give him what God gave him--the opportunity to not only create a child, but also to raise that child. It's about time America took note of the results in those homes where we have emasculated fathers, before we attempt to emasculate and rob another father of his desire to raise his son!
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